Thursday, January 31, 2008

My Question

I woke up this morning and the message was more of a question...

Can a woman sound the war horn? Can a female raise her voice in a warrior cry and know that her brothas raise their voice too in solidarity? If I slit the throat of a black wild boar and say "lets drink!" who will drink with me and march into battle with me? If I - a woman says "enough is enough! we fight NOW!" will I only hear the echo of my own voice?
You see nothing is how it use to be and I am not sure that we will go back to the past in our "promised future". As I grow older I realize that the Spirit World is forever lifting the veil - pushing us towards a new future - pushing us towards change.
Sometimes I think we as a people suffer so much because we can not give the "war horn" to the sistah - we can't trust her to know that it is time. Yet this begs the question of who was the original keeper of time? The cycle of time runs in a woman - a woman's menstrual cycle runs in a 28 day process. It is said that a woman menstrual cycle is linked to the cycle of the moon. Traditional understanding indicates that women menstruate at the time of the new moon, and ovulate at the full moon.
The word "menstruation" is etymologically related to moon. The terms "menstruation" and "menses" come from the term mensis (month), which in turn relates to the early term mene (moon). It is said that women became oppressed by men when they discovered their secret of time keeping.
We Sistahs are very valuable. Our worth is worth more than our weight in gold. We are able to give birth to a nation and yet there is this constant message that we are simple objects - to be used for pleasure, used for anger and discarded we are deemed useless. In a world of obvious power imbalances and oppression we still have to "prove" that we are abused, that crimes have been committed against us. After all our cries fall on deaf ears we still wake to fix the breakfast and get the children off to school. How can a nation built literally on the milk of Afrikan women's breast ever think they will succeed at any -I mean ANY ENDEAVOR without her total liberation?
Sistah C

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Gifted With Sight

I was remembering Eve's Bayou.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Accept Transformation

I was working on a brochure today for my organization. As I made a change the computer brought up a message box that said, "Accept Transformation". I find my advice from many sources so why not a computer. Today, I felt myself get on this whirlwind for a ride...
my now ex-husband wrote me an email telling me I would only have one opportunity to get my personal items from what was once our home. I just blew up - I was wondering why would anyone who had ever claimed to love you treat you this way. A friend said, "he must be very wounded." I would like to think something more harsh but this wise friend is right.
I think people have not seen me get angry about this but I am. I am rageful but I am careful not to spread my rage - I think it is poisionous to share some of my thoughts with people because in general we are all immersed too much in negativity. I have sectioned off a place in one of my journals where I just rant and rave...where I accuse even the most innocent. Its the only way to help myself get over the fact that I could have ever made such a deep misinterpretation of someone's character.
Everyday I wish to remain positive and move forward...even when I reach a bump in the road.

The message from the Tao

The great Way is easy,
yet people prefer the side paths.
Be aware when things are out of balance.
Stay centered within the Tao.

When rich speculators prosper
while farmers lose their land;
when government officials spend money
on weapons instead of cures;
when the upper class is extravagant and
while the poor have nowhere to turn-
all this is robbery and chaos.
It is not in keeping with the Tao.

Monday, January 28, 2008

Roach Medicine: Constant and Sure

Baba Kweku told me some time ago that our people need to understand "roach energy". The roach is one of the most despised insects on the planet, it has the ability to destroy reputations simply by its presence. However, the roach has been traced back to "prehistoric" times, the Kemetic people deified one of its close cousins because it feed its young off its own dung and we have learned that if an atom bomb exploded two things would be still be around...tweenkies and roaches. Today, I was in a dry (hot!!!) sauna with my friend at the gym and she jumped up when she saw a baby roach crawling around on the floor. Lets be clear that baby roach is in its training ground- by the time it becomes mature it will probably be immune to the bottom of someone's shoe!
Roach medicine is about surviving the fallout. Roaches show us to walk in life like you SUPPOSE TO BE THERE even in the midst of chaos and destruction. Roach medicine tells you your life will continue despite some of the worst challenges. Things that would have killed someone else will only make you stronger. Roaches are masters at adapting to their ever changing environment - perhaps it is because they are driven by their purpose...How powerful the message is from this "nasty" beetle.

Lately I have been selecting a passage from the Tao after my meditation. I thought this one important to share...

What is rooted is easy to nourish.
What is recent is easy to correct.
What is brittle is easy to break.
What is small is easy to scatter.

Prevent trouble before it arises.
Put things in order before they exist.
The giant pine tree
grows from a tiny sprout.
The journey of a thousand miles
starts from beneath your feet.

Rushing into action, you fail.
Trying to grasp things, you lose them.
Forcing a project to completion,
you ruin what was almost ripe.

Therefore the Master takes action
by letting things take their course.
She remains as calm
at the end as at the beginning.
She has nothing,
thus has nothing to lose.

What she desires is non-desire;
what she learns is to unlearn.
She simply reminds people
of who they have always been.
She cares about nothing but the Tao.
Thus she can care for all things.

Sistah C

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Ahhhh!!! Creativity.....

My ancestor altar in my room with two recent art pieces... we go...the ART JOURNAL process that I have been promising to do... well, I had to take a small break before I got started.

This week we are going to work on the cover OR first inside page. I got a book from the Goodwill store for $1.50 - it was a children's book called Aladdin's Magic Lamp. I thought it be a good choice for my first "altered book project".

I went to walmart (forgive me Goddess of Fair Business Practices)and got some Gesso. You can get this at hobby lobby, michael's or any other crafts store. The brand is not very important - so feel free to use the most inexpensive type. If you can't find Gesso then use white acrylic paint with no water on the brush. You may need to do a few layers.

Take a clean dry brush and apply the Gesso to the front cover or inside cover (if you are not doing your cover). The Gesso is thick, apply enough to cover the title and cover image(s). Let the cover dry. You may need a day or just an hour or two depending.

Once the Gesso is dry you have a clean canvas. What I get from researching altered books and art journals is that it is best to work in layers. I applied one layer of red - let it dry - then another layer gold - making swirls in the paint with my brush. I use a dry brush to give the paint texture and minimize curling of my paper.

On one side of my cover I added "gem-like" sequence and glitter to the wet paint which gave it this funky texture.

Just go for it! There is no right or wrong. You can always add more Gesso if you don't like what you got. Paste down pictures or use an old comb to add texture to the wet paint or you could ball up some foil and brush the wet paint with it to make a unique look.

Let your paint dry and for the rest of this week work on the cover. You could make a collage, you could brush on tiny pieces of tissue paper with glue (like paper mache) or you could add pieces of fabric, little odds and ends from the garden, photos, etc...Your Free to do What You Want. I suggest making this first journal about you!!!
Get an old baby picture or school picture. Go for it. Use glue, hot glue guns, paste - what ever works.

Love your creation. Let it speak to you. At the end of this week take a photo and share it with us. I think you can do this??? If not, create a free account and upload your pictures there and send me the url - I will post them on my blog. Have fun!!!

Sistah C

Saturday, January 26, 2008

The Road To Freedom

**Art Journal Starts Tomorrow**

I got several messages last week congratulating me on my new Freedom. Everyday since my divorce it has sunk in that I AM FREE...Not just from an abusive marriage but from its whole story. I have noticed that I want to speak less and less about the "story" because its power has shifted. I am not suppressing what happened or "forgeting it" but I am forgiving it. I am continuing on with my 40 day Prosperity Plan (I just started over) and today's affirmation says:

"When I am aware of the God-Self within me as my total fulfillment, I am totally fulfilled. I am now aware of this truth. I have found the secret of life and I relax in the knowledge that the activity of Divine Abundance is eternally operating in my life. I simply have to be aware of the flow, the radiation of the creative energy, which is continuously, easily and effortlessly pouring forth from my divine consciousness. I am now aware. I am now in the flow."

I wanted to share what came up for me in my journal after meditation.

It is time to place the old story aside- it was once true- it had its place but NOW it is no longer relevant. God/The Creator has taken over and the truth of my divine life is shining through. I can't be poor, I can't be without, I can't be unsupported because my support is all around me! I simply have to follow Spirit's orders and do what has to be done. I walk up to the slate and I wipe it clean - I let the universe handle all the transgressions - the rights and wrongs and I just move forward. I eat through my cocoon to release my wings. The wind supports my flight in freedom.


My vision for Art Heals Us is beginning to take shape. I see many Sistahs around the world coming together to make art together as a means of healing ourselves. I see us sharing our techniques, our processes...ancient ways of being and sharing. I realize that my trip to Tanzania is not about "taking a trip" it is about healing and learning. While I am there I will meet with some Sistahs who have started a weaving project to re-use plastic grocery bags into purses. These plastic bags I am told litter the road side in Tanzania - so much so - that the government outlawed the use of them going forward. To save the earth the Sistahs and children in the area are gathering the littered bags and making them a sustainable product that is perfect for shopping. My wish is to meet with them to discuss their efforts and to learn the process to bring back here.
Next weekend, February 1,2 & 3rd in Atlanta I am hosting my first fundraiser for ART HEALS US. It will be a weekend workshop that will teach doll making. The funds for the class will be used to help develop the organization - go towards developing a 501 c3, creating a bank account and towards my development of programs. My wish is to raise funds to create free classes for those in need - ie. going to domestic violence shelters, working with youth in need. I have space for 10 to 12 women to participate. We will start Friday evening and continue on Saturday then Sunday. The doll we create will be a vision and symbol for our own personal healing and development. I hope those in Atlanta will participate. The cost is $60 with a $10 materials fee. Snacks will be included. My mother has opened up her beautiful home in southwest Atlanta for this fundraiser. Space is limited to 12 participants. EARLY REGISTRATION REQUIRED (THURSDAY, JANUARY 31ST DEADLINE) so we have enough materials for each participant. The dolls are made of paper mache' and various textiles. NO PREVIOUS ART EXPERIENCE REQUIRED. Total Freedom to Create!!! Call me at 404-424-9194 or email me at or write me at ART HEALS US, PO BOX 11021, Atlanta, GA 30331 My website should be up soon - the url is

Thank you for your consideration and support.
Sistah C
PS. The Healing From Violence Quilt is going great. Beautiful quilting squares. We will get together a quilting circle soon - so if you are interested please contact me at the above info.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Rape in Kenya

A friend sent this news article to me. Everywhere you look the womb of the Afrikan woman is being violated. Whether it is on the Continent or in the Diaspora. Whether it is between two nations or a husband and a wife. Please read the following article.
Sistah C
PS. Trying to work out this art journal video...sorry for the delay. I may just end up using photos.

Gang rape spirals in violent Kenya
By Stephanie Holmes
BBC News

Rape is on the rise in Kenya, troubled by violence which followed December's disputed elections.

Every day women turn up at the doors of Nairobi's hospitals and clinics telling the same story.

"I could not run away. They gagged my mouth and pinned me down," one woman remembers.

"After raping me they blindfolded me and led me to a nearby forest. That's where they left me."

Her experience - doctors, officials and the UN say - is echoed by hundreds of other women who have survived a spiralling number of sexual attacks.

Many are gang rapes, carried out by groups of armed men.

Staff in the Nairobi Women's Hospital - one of Kenya's leading centres for the treatment of rape and sexual violence - say they have seen double the number of cases affecting women, teenagers and girls since January.

"Since the beginning of the month, we have had 140 cases of rape and defilement," said Rahab Ngugi, patient services manager at the hospital.

"We were used to seeing an average of about four cases a day, now there is an average of between eight and 10."

Almost half of the cases at the hospital's specialised clinic are girls under the age of 18, Ms Ngugi said. One case was a two-year-old baby girl.

She knows that such a dramatic rise in numbers presenting at the clinic indicates that the reality beyond is far worse.

Tip of iceberg

Only a small percentage of women actually come to receive medical treatment and counselling in the immediate aftermath of a sexual attack, she said. It means they do not get access to the drugs which might prevent the onset of HIV.

Battles are fought on women's bodies as much as on battlefields
Kathleen Cravero, UNDP
"It is the tip of the iceberg," Ms Ngugi said. "At any time of unrest, of violence, or rioting, women and children are targeted. It is revenge, it is war. People are fighting and the weakest ones get abused."

Clashes broke out across Kenya in late December after President Mwai Kibaki declared himself the winner of an election disputed by the opposition and labelled as flawed by the international community.

An estimated quarter of a million people have fled their homes to escape the unrest and some 85% of these are women and children.

Women's position of relative weakness in society is emphasised in times of conflict, Kathleen Cravero, Director of the UNDP's Bureau for Crisis Prevention and Recovery said.

"Battles are fought on women's bodies as much as on battlefields. It is not so much that women are targeted in some deliberate way but their vulnerability makes them easy targets for anger, for frustration, and for people wanting to cripple or paralyse other segments of the community in which they live."

She says there is no evidence as yet that Kenya's high levels of sexual violence are ethnically motivated rather than opportunistic and criminal.

But the doubling of rape cases, she says, is "a very, very strong indicator of a serious problem" adding that the actual numbers are without doubt far higher.


Women often have other concerns that prevent them seeking help after an attack, said Hadley Muchela, a Nairobi-based rape counsellor with NGO Liverpool VCT.

"If there is a woman who probably saw her relatives killed, she might push her own issues of violence to the periphery.

"There will be worries about property and the death of children. Their immediate needs are temporary shelter, safety and food."

He worries that although the gangs are not yet targeting makeshift, unregulated camps and shelters - in schools, churches and community centres - the women and their children sheltering there are increasingly vulnerable.

The UN says that in the capital alone some 12,000 people are living in public buildings after being driven from their homes.

Ms Cravero agrees that these shelters should be the focus of concern.

"Many of the internally displaced are not living in formal camps. They are just gathered around a school or church. Then you have the worst-case scenario - where you don't have that level of law and order and you have people living on top of each other."

The only way to prevent the almost inevitable spike in violence towards women in times of crisis, she said, is for governments to tackle the sense of impunity.

"Before violence breaks out, and during, and after, [governments must] really push the question of impunity, make sure that people know that rape visited upon innocent women and children will be treated for what it is - a crime."

Story from BBC NEWS:

Published: 2008/01/23 16:26:26 GMT


Tuesday, January 22, 2008


I am sorry about the delay with my art journaling project. I will start on it soon- maybe in a day or two. In the meanwhile, I wanted to let you all know that I got my DIVORCE!!! I AM HAPPY! It has been a long road for me - one of pain and of continued healing. This morning - like in my last post, I realized that the price of "things" is a very small price. I will have to start over but my integrity is in place - I don't think the same can be said the for the other party...My friend drove me to the courthouse this morning and on the way we had to stop for gas. She pulled in back of another car and jumped out to pump the gas. The brothah in the car in front came back and spoke to my friend- she then opened the car door and said, "this man wanted to know if you were a minister. I told him he better talk to you because I don't know- I told him you were very spiritual..." The man looked into the car and I smiled and thanked him but said no. He said, " I just wanted to let you know that I saw a light around you...I also wanted to let you know that whatever you are going through you are blessed by God - it may not seem like things are in your favor but know you are truly blessed." Tears came to my eyes and I told him that he really didn't know how timely his words were. I told him I was on my way to court and he said immediately, "then let us pray." From there he came in the car and my friend was on the other side of him and he prayed for me right then and there - on the spot! I was crying- tears rolling down my face because I knew this was a message. It was a confirmation that I WAS GOING TO BE OK AND THAT THESE SMALL THINGS COULD NEVER DEFINE ME. I AM A DIVINE CHILD OF THE CREATOR, THAT HAS THE FULL BLESSING OF THE SPIRIT WORLD. I soaked that prayer up from this was like the universe shifted as he spoke. When he was done- he affirmed to me that I was going to be ok and got in his car and left.
Now tell me- what more did I need to know??? Today (like all days) God/The Creator/Mother/Father had my back! The part I needed to do was to BELIEVE. To walk in that courtroom and sign whatever and KNOW that my son and I was going to be ok. It took faith. I had to ignore the smirks from across the table, the looks of false pride that said "we won" because I knew better...
So, celebrate for me -send me words of encouragement!! I am asking for it! Ain't too proud to ask.

Ok, so I promised to share with you how prosperity consciousness has been working for me and after the 40-days it still continues...A friend called me the other day and told me that she is going to gift me with a trip to a healing retreat in Tanzania !!! Yes, you all - I am going to the MOTHERLAND this February for 17 days. We are going to do a healing climb on Mt. Meru (the Spirit Mountain) which is the second tallest mountain in Tanzania. CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS??? In my wildest dreams I don't think I would have thought that this would happen for me right now - this is why it is important to LET GO AND LET SPIRIT be the force in your life to give you what you need. The fierce generosity of all my friends has been overwhelming - it has confirmed that I am on the right track. I thank everyone for their support. Please know that my work is in dedication to all those generous souls - "those children of the most high" who have lifted me up when I was down. Much Peace and Love.
Sistah C

Saturday, January 19, 2008


I just finished reading this book called Everyday Matters by Danny Gregory - well, actually it is an art and written journal. It is the sketches and thoughts of a man whose has to re-examine what is important to him after his wife is seriously injured in a subway accident. I recommend this book if you too are looking at meaning lately and wondering about what REALLY MATTERS...
I think it is a question that I always ended up asking myself after one of life's major lessons - and it always seems to come back to a feeling more than words. It may be hard to describe but I will try...
it is like catching the scent of a sweet flower as the wind blows by...
it is like an unexpected gift from a dear friend...
it is like a compliment from the most unlikely place...
it is like that water that comes after a dry thrist...
it is like the look on a child's face when she learns something new...
it is like that feeling you think you would have if you won the lottery...
it is like the first time you tell someone you love them and they love you too...
it is like a deep blue sky...
it is like eating a nice meal...
it is like standing back and looking at something you have created and realizing it is pretty damn good...
it is like seeing a child being born...
it is like that emotion that rises up inside of you when you hear that certain song...
it is like that sigh of relief when you know you have been forgiven...
it is like that feeling you get when you know you have not been forgotten...
it is like the warmth of the sun on your body when you move into the light...
it is like knowing you are blessed regardless of the appearance of anything else...

I have realized through the divorce process that there is this illusion that "things" matter. What really mattered was the relationship not the things. I woke up one morning and realized that I was so blessed - I had a place to live, I had my health,
I had food to eat, I had friends, I had the love of my son and family...I AM SO RICH! For months I felt like I needed my husband to give me MY things back and to pay me what he took from our accounts and I realize for almost 6 months now I have lived - I MEAN I HAVE REALLY LIVED without anything he has been holding on to...I realize that I will continue to live...I will start over AND I will continue to LIVE. No one can take this away from me, NO ONE... I AM A DIVINE CHILD OF THE CREATOR, MY ANCESTORS HAVE MY BACK...MY SPIRIT HAS BEEN RESTORED...if the price to pay is but a few material things then LET IT BE...

My Message to You
Don't wait until tomorrow to be great, to be wonderful, to be loved and respected. Don't sacrifice another moment. THE WORLD NEEDS YOU, YOUR TALENTS, YOUR LOVE AND YOUR SPIRIT. WE EACH MUST DO OUR PART but it can't be done in oppression, selfishness and lack. TRUST SPIRIT, TRUST YOURSELF.
Sistah C

Tomorrow I am beginning the art journal process online. I am just going to be organic with the whole thing. Just have fun with this and let go...I got a children's hardback book from goodwill for $1.50 and decided to alter it. You can use an old book, an old binder and make pages out of various materials like paper bags... use what is around you... some of us live in good ole' America where we got too much of everything we don't need. Use fabric - old pieces of dresses, shirts, etc...
Hobby Lobby, Michaels or any arts and crafts place will have the materials you need. Don't spend a lot...
Here is a suggested list to get started...
a journal or old book or pieces of paper and a binder...or whatever...
Gesso or/and white acrylic paint
paint brushes of various sizes
tissue paper
old gift wrap
old post/greeting cards
water color
acrylic paints
paper plate (for palette)
cup for water
paper towels
gel pins
sharpie pens
a nice place to create...

I think I will start with a picture of myself...but you could start with anything...

Until tomorrow.... Have a beautiful and blessed day!!!

Thursday, January 17, 2008


As I end one cycle and move into another I recognize that this 40 Day Prosperity Plan has never failed. I think its success is in getting you to realize just where the POWER is in the Divine Creative Force I call the Creator. The power of doing this process for 40 days is that it is the amount of time it takes for your conscious to take hold of this idea - that nothing is greater than the force of Spirit in our lives. I used this knowledge to help myself rebuild my confidence, my trust and love in myself. I now understand that the best way for me to be well is to TAKE CARE OF MYSELF even in the mist of many things to do. My inner voice is much louder lately from this process and I am able to hear what it is that I need to do. I am so grateful because this voice of Spirit is always on my side.
In these last 40 days I have realized my greatest treasure has been my family and my friends. I have realized that when times get rough I have relationships that are truly sustainable. These really are the times that you find out who your friends are and I feel so blessed that I have many friends. I want to thank my friends from Grad School - who just came together swiftly and surrounded me with support, my friends from Spirit Rock Meditation Center -where I use to work - they gave me a gift that helped me start this new life journey. The many friends of the dharma who helped me as well. I want to thank many of my new friends that I met in Atlanta -Sistah friends, parents from my son's school, my son's teachers, neighbors and many others. I want to thank my family - my aunts, uncles, cousins and a BIG THANK YOU to my Mother - who has supported my son and I for the last five months without any financial help. The BIGGEST THANKS TO MY 15 yr old SON who held in there -who told me there where many times he wanted to leave the household and go live with his father but felt he should stay because he was worried for me.
This is just to share with you my experience of realizing my true abundance. I hope you will share what you have experienced along this journey. Remember your treasures are all around you.
Tomorrow is the first day of the 40Day Art Journal Process. I hope you will join me in the creative process. Click here for the some inspiration from the Society for Altered Book Artist-check out the gallery. ART HEALS US! SPIRIT HEALS US!
Sistah C

DAY 40!!! (write it down, meditate for 15min and journal your thoughts)
40. I keep my mind and thoughts off "this world" and I place my entire focus on God/The Creator within as the only Cause of my prosperity. I acknowledge the Inner Presence as the only activity in my financial affairs, as the substance of all things visible. I place my faith in the Principle of Abundance in action within me.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008


Artist: Karen Michael

OK, we are on DAY 39 of the 40 DAY PROSPERITY PLAN- I need a little something from you - a tiny, itsy bitsy report on how this was for you. Don't keep it to yourself!! Share the love! So, today or tomorrow drop me a comment or two - let me know "It was fabulous!" or "You just didn't get it" - its ok either way. I have been sharing a little along the way but I will sum it all up tomorrow.

Ok, I have fallen in love again- yes, soooo soon but it is true and it is with ART. It is like a new world that has opened up to me and I want to share it with you. So, the next 40-DAYS I am starting an ART JOURNAL with you! You may be thinking I AM NOT AN ARTIST but the reality is that art is everywhere - it is our perspective visualized. An art journal is about you not about some structured process that has you coloring in the lines. In many cultures there is no word really for art because it is integrated with daily life. Join me in this process - I know it will be fun.

Materials Needed:

A journal with paper that can withstand painting, etc... MOLESKIN is a good brand - you can get one at Barnes & Noble or
you can use a water color tablet, etc... there is no need for it to be expensive. If all you got is $5 you can do this.

*I am about revolutionary art or what is called "art by the people" - which means I use recycled materials -like pieces of old shirts, dress, news paper, old books, etc... If you can't afford to get a journal- use an old book with nicer, thicker paper - like an encyclopedia( you know the kind that says Black people were never slaves and Columbus discovered Amerika -time make those books tell the truth) - you maybe able to get one for .25 cents or less at the goodwill or a garage sale. If you use a book then buy some stuff called Gesso (its a white paste like stuff that will cover the pages so you can have a clean canvas or use white acrylic paint). We are going to create great art and money WILL NEVER STAND IN THE WAY. Art is going to continue this prosperity process because we are going to start thinking outside of the box and using our creativity to answer life's questions.

Other materials: some paint (acrylic, watercolor, use what you have), some oil pastels, chalk pastels, charcoal pencil (or a dark lead pencil), pens, glitter, glue, - really what ever you got- you don't need all of this right away.

Like the prosperity plan we are going to work on the journal everyday - little by little. So make a commitment to find atleast 15mins a day. You may want to consider a size journal that you can take in your purse or bag so you can doodle during lunchtime where ever you are OR you could wake up just a few minutes early each day to do some art. There is time.

We will do 2 pages a week. On the first two pages lets start with a childhood picture of yourself or if you don't have one a representation of your "child-self". You have today and tomorrow to get your stuff together. I hope you will join me!!!

We got 45 quilting squares from the community assembly the other night!! It was really wonderful and everyone did a great job!! I will down load a few pictures soon. Feel free to send in a quilt square - it is just a 6"x6" square of fabric with your art and/or written message for those impacted by family/intimate partner violence. Send it to ART HEALS US, PO BOX 11021, Atlanta, GA 30310
Lastly, I am working on my website for ART HEALS US but if you go to the url you will see the flyer I made for my first Sistah Art Circle. If you are in ATL please come - its going to be fun and the cost will be low to no cost - if I can find a free space that works. Go to ARTHEALSUS.ORG

DAY 39 (write it down, meditate on it for 15min, journal your thoughts)
39. When I am aware of the God Self within me as my total fulfillment, I am totally fulfilled. I am now aware of this Truth. I have found the secret of life, and I relax in the knowledge that the Activity of Divine Abundance is eternally operating in my life. I simply have to be aware of the flow, the radiation, of that Creative Energy, which is continuously, easily and effortlessly pouring forth from my Divine Consciousness. I am now aware. I am now in the flow.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008


I think one of the most important books everyone can read is Parable of the Sower by Octavia Butler - if not for the story for the concept of the Universe and God, The Creator -which Butler calls in the book Earthseed:
Earthseed: The Books of the Living
All that you touch
You Change.

All that you Change
Changes you.

The only lasting truth
Is Change.

Is Change.

(Parable of the Sower, Octavia E. Butler)

The story is of a young Sistah Goddess named Lauren Olamina. She forms her own religion based on her observation that everything in the universe changes. Change is the one constant in life. People can either accept change and work with it for the betterment of themselves and their community, or they can resist it, hoping in vain that things will carry on the way they always have done.

I woke up this morning with a vision of myself outside on a path in the forest. I was wearing white and my feet were bare. I was like a walking tree - my feet able to connect deeply with the earth and if I stood in one place long enough I knew I would become rooted there...I realize that this vision is about being in my true nature about living LIKE NATURE. Nature adapts but it is always clear of its purpose - this is why you will see a tree grow through concrete - you see the concrete's strength is only an illusion- there is no permanency because underneath it all is the earthseed that must grow- that must fulfill its purpose regardless of what man has placed in its path. That is me- I was told clearly today - that my destiny is set- I must fulfill my purpose. I can take as many detours as I want- I can stubble on my path -I can try to take other roads - but all roads lead to my destiny. I was told that Spirit will wait- Spirit is not impatient-human time means little to the SpiritWorld. I was directed this morning to have faith - to KNOW THAT DESTINY HAS BEEN GIVEN ITS DUE. Someone needs to hear this...perhaps it is you?? THERE IS NO POWER GREATER THAN THAT OF OUR CREATOR AND THE CREATOR IS THE ONLY ONE THAT CAN GIVE US OUR DESTINY- all else is illusion - all else is simply a lie.
Sistah C

DAY 38 (write it down, meditate on it and journal your thoughts)
38. My consciousness of the Spirit within me as my unlimited Source is the Divine Power to restore the years the locusts have eaten, to make all things new, to lift me up to the High Road of abundant prosperity. This awareness, understanding and knowledge of Spirit appears as every visible form and experience that I could possibly desire.

Monday, January 14, 2008


Knowing that none of us are completely healed - that work on ourselves is constantly required. It is important that we remind each other often of what is working and what is not working. I think a lot of confusion comes about when actions don't match the words. Often people who use image control as a way of moving through life-meaning they want to be perceived one way and behind the scenes act another way. This is not healthy - it is not productive and it surely is not revolutionary.

A friend called me in the middle of writing this post and I was reminded to ask the question...

Are the following beliefs and/or actions promoting sustainability of the Afrikan community?

1.Uplifting the image of the man regardless of his transgressions against women, children and others in the community.
2. Belief that the delicate membrane of marriage between Afrikans can withstand the penetration of cheating and so-called polygamy.
3. Lying to protect your image.
4. Belief that women should keep silent about abuse in order to promote positive imagery of Afrikan relationships.
5. Teaching our sons to lie to get what they want from women and punishing our daughters (Women) for giving our sons what they lied to get.
6. Using religion and "tradition" to suppress and oppress the female spirit.
7. Using Africanity in combination with classist behavior to promote "negro ideology".
8. Exploiting African people for profit and personal gain.
9. Keeping access to knowledge, processes and practices available to only a select few.
10. Never re-evaluating your own beliefs to further the healing of yourself, your family and your community.

***This list is not in order of importance or exhaustive of the beliefs or actions that inform this question.

DAY 37 (write it down, meditate, journal your thoughts)
37. The Divine Consciousness that I am is forever expressing its true nature of Abundance. This is its responsibility, not mine. My only responsibility is to be aware of this Truth. Therefore, I am totally confident in letting go and letting God/The Creator appear as the abundant all sufficiency in my life and affairs.

Sunday, January 13, 2008


The community assembly on Domestic Violence was in my mind a great success-why?-because I saw Afrikans from all over Atlanta coming together to try to put our arms around a BIG ISSUE in our community. We shared our experiences, we found out some of the facts and offered some suggestions...But our BIGGEST VICTORY was in seeing each other's humanity. NO ONE IS PURE IN THIS ISSUE we all have ways in which we have supported oppression and the healing is in knowing that NONE OF US ARE BORN DEMONS - we may have some demons but that comes from experiences in life that we got to heal. I was encouraged by many people that have healed (or are still healing) from their experiences with abuse and violence of all kinds - things that were at times hard to conceive of anyone having to experience yet they are POWERFUL VICTORS. The Creator, the SpiritWorld and the Ancestors have given us a precious gift in our experiences and it is the ability to heal from them and come out stronger and wiser than we had been before - this is why it is in our best benefit to explore our experiences. Don't walk away from experience but walk towards it - take an up close look and see it for what it is.
My understanding of what COMMUNITY actually is and what it isn't is becoming more and more clear. It is not a clique-it is not exclusive. We Africans throughout the world need each other- we really need each other- the last person you should be ashamed to come to is your brothah or sistah. The Tao is an old text from the Asian culture and it is very profound. The story is that war was breaking out and chaos existed everywhere. A young military man saw a elder leaving town to go be a hermit in the forest. This elder he knew was very old and must have seen many things and understood many things. He begged the elder before he left to write down some words of wisdom to help the community as they go through turmoil. The elder agreed and the small book called the Tao is his advice. One of the verses says, "A good man is a bad man's teacher and bad man is a good man's work. If you don't understand this then you will understand very little about life." I take from this that it is never good enough to say, "this person is bad' and walk away. It is our responsibility if we know another way to show this person what we know. A good teacher knows this...We have got to be generous with each other-very giving of our wisdom so that all of us can heal.
BIG THANKS TO THOSE WHO SHOWED UP (organizers, organizations, community folks) AND DID THE WORK and are still doing the WORK.
Sistah C

DAY 36 (write it down, meditate on it and journal your thoughts)
36. My inner supply instantly and constantly takes on form and experience according to my needs and desires, and as the Principle of Supply in action, it is impossible for me to have any unfulfilled needs or desires.

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Community Assembly Tonite Atlanta - DAY 35-40DAY PROSPERITY PLAN

Tonite it the Community Assembly on Domestic Violence in the Afrikan Community. My hope is that those who can show up and give their opinion on the issue of family violence in our community. Don't leave it up to the police, the government and other outside institutions to end it - because the only people that can change this issue for the better is us. We need to come together with solutions that will address our particular issues and resolve problems in a way serves our specific needs.
Many Sistahs do NOT call the police (I did not) because we don't want to send our husband, boyfriend and/or children's father to jail - to be another Brothah in jail. Sistahs often use informal networks such as spiritual centers, friends and family. It is critical that all of us UNDERSTAND THE ISSUES if we are to help each other. Domestic Violence can be physical, psychological and verbal.Someone suffering from abuse may not have outward scars or black eyes. Often abusers punch their victims in places that will be covered up with clothing, often abusers are using manipulation, threats of harm, economic violence and verbal put downs. Some Sistahs also live with an abuser and a GUN in the household. If you know of someone that needs help - it is best to access the situation carefully. Approach them about your concerns when you are sure the suspected abuser is not around. Lend an ear - sometimes just listening is the best help of all. If there is an emergency situation please call 911. You can always call an organization that helps victims of intimate violence to get resources and learn more about what you can do to help. A BIG THANK YOU TO THOSE OF YOU WHO DO HELP!

DAY 35 (write it down, meditate and journal your thoughts)
35. Money is not my supply. No person, place or condition is my supply. My awareness, understanding, and knowledge of the all-providing activity of the Divine Mind within me is my supply. My consciousness of this Truth is unlimited, therefore, my supply is unlimited.

Friday, January 11, 2008


Last night I was invited on WRFG radio station to speak about my experiences with domestic violence and a project I have started with two other powerful Sistahs - one an activist/midwife and the other a storyteller/media professional. The project is called Healing From Violence Quilting Project. The project is a collaborative community effort that seeks to break the silence on intimate partner violence in our community. We will introduce the process at this Saturday's Community Assembly on Violence in Atlanta. The project provides 6"x6" quilting squares to people who wish to honor those they have known who are victims and survivors of intimate partner violence (domestic violence). There are three different color squares that communicate the level of violence the person has experienced: red is for a person that has lost their life to intimate partner violence, yellow is for a person currently in violent relationship and green is for a person that is healing from a past experience with intimate partner violence. The Healing From Violence Quilting Project will collect completed quilting squares and sew together the squares with the help of professional quilters. Our hope is that the quilt can travel to various community events and organizations. We are looking for donations of supplies, funds to help with getting the word out and also completed squares from all over the country. If you want to help in anyway please contact me at or send donations (we are not a 501c3 yet) to ART HEALS US, P.O. Box 11021, Atlanta, GA 30310
I also wanted to talk more about my "ministry" that has come to me. I have started a community practice called ART HEALS US - which will provide a safe place for survivors of domestic violence to explore healing and empowerment through art. During my own healing process I have come to realize that ART HEALS - it helped me to open new doors for myself and empower myself to move forward with faith. I re-remembered that my dream in grad school was to work with people using art as a healing modality. The quilting project came out of this dream and so does this community practice I have developed. My first Sistah's Art Circle starts soon and my intention is to be able to offer it for free or a low cost to cover supplies and a space.
So, this is my work - my purpose and I have to say that there was a blessing in all of these challenges that I have experienced which was to realize my DIVINE WORK and to find a process in which to begin my own healing. If you are interested in donating supplies or funds to help Sistahs healing from domestic violence to participate in this art program - please email me at I will launch a website soon for ART HEALS US, in the meantime the address is PO BOX 11021, Atlanta, GA 30331
I am truly grateful for all the supporters that have helped me through (and continue to help me through) this process of self healing. My dedication is help others begin their own healing process so we can heal our families and community.
Sistah C

DAY 34 (write it down, meditate on it and journal your thoughts)
34. Through my consciousness of my Original-Spirit-Self, the Creator within me, as my Source, I draw into my mind and feeling nature the very substance of Spirit. This substance is my supply, thus my consciousness of the Presence the Creator, the Spirit World and my Ancestors within me is my supply.

Thursday, January 10, 2008


It is important for me to reiterate that abusers are often not abusive early on in a relationship. In fact they are probably the most "charming", "sensitive", "smart" and "outgoing" people you could ever encounter - this is because they have to "sale" themselves. Most abusers have a long history of abuse (I found this out). Often they see their relationships as the problem NOT themselves -so they go from person to person. Most of the time they have dysfunctional relationships with people that cover up for their abusive past or they seem to have a lot people who just don't plain like them. The abuser will try to paint themselves as someone with bad luck - but is that really the case? I URGE EVERY SISTAH WHO JUST HAS THAT "FUNNY" FEELING ABOUT A NEW GUY TO CHECK HIM OUT- SEE WHAT PEOPLE HAVE TO SAY...A PERSON'S ACTIONS SPEAK WAY LOUDER THAN WORDS. Click Here for good information on abusers and their behaviors.
Can an abusive person heal themselves? Not overnight. Abusers need to work hard to heal themselves and THEY must do the work and want to be healed. Like alcoholics they have to first admit that they have a serious problem and then they have to commit to not being with another person until they have sought help and worked on themselves. Unfortunately this rarely happens because many can't face the horrible acts they have committed.
EVERY SISTAH DESERVES TO BE TREATED WITH RESPECT. Love does not compromise respect. Sex is NOT love. Gifts can't buy you safety. Professional well educated men CAN be abusers. Sistahs we are told constantly by the media that we are destined to be single, that we don't have enough men in our community. Is that true?? Lack is not only about money - lack consciousness can also have you make choices to be with an abusive man. STOP READING MAGAZINES, LISTENING TO SONGS, WATCHING TV SHOWS THAT PROMOTE "LACK OF GOOD MEN (AND WOMEN) SYNDROME". It creates a message for your consciousness that says "settle for the this..." and what you settle for may have you black and blue.
When we really believe we are DIVINE CHILDREN OF THE CREATOR there is no shortage of good men. When we believe in ourselves and our DIVINE INHERITANCE then our perfect mate is within our reach and will show up in divine perfect time. I have come to understand that we must first be that thing that we want in a perfect mate. If we want someone who is on purpose -we need to be on purpose. If we want someone who is successful and all that - we must be successful and ALL THAT!!
Use the principles of prosperity in every aspect of your life -the world is abundant, overflowing with beautiful, loving, smart, spiritual brothas who are GREAT MEN with integrity.

DAY 33 (write it down, meditate on it for 15min, journal your thoughts)
33. I am conscious of the Inner Presence as my lavish Abundance. I am conscious of the constant activity of this Mind of infinite Prosperity. Therefore, my consciousness is filled with the Light of Truth.

Wednesday, January 9, 2008


"Women abuse is a nation at war with its own mother because in Africa
we are taught that every woman whether she is a human woman or a 4 footed
cow is your mother. Anyone who hits a woman actually hits his own
mother." -Baba Credo

I woke up this morning with the whisper in my ear saying "What is African Values? Everyone seems to be so sure they know...I will tell you it is very Ancient - so Ancient that many people would be surprise to find themselves still practicing the ways of our oppressors. When a tree is ill the disease is at the root. When there is balance your life will reflect it - when there is imbalance your life will demonstrate it. Ideas that promote imbalance will continue to produce chaos."


Recognizing Child Abuse and Neglect: Signs and Symptoms by the Child Welfare Information Gateway

The first step in helping abused or neglected children is learning to recognize the signs of child abuse and neglect. The presence of a single sign does not prove child abuse is occurring in a family; however, when these signs appear repeatedly or in combination you should take a closer look at the situation and consider the possibility of child abuse.

If you do suspect a child is being harmed, reporting your suspicions may protect the child and get help for the family. Contact your local child protective services agency or police department. For more information about where and how to file a report, call the Childhelp® National Child Abuse Hotline (1.800.4.A.CHILD).

Recognizing Child Abuse

The following signs may signal the presence of child abuse or neglect.

The Child:
Shows sudden changes in behavior or school performance.
Has not received help for physical or medical problems brought to the parents' attention.
Has learning problems (or difficulty concentrating) that cannot be attributed to specific physical or psychological causes.
Is always watchful, as though preparing for something bad to happen.
Lacks adult supervision.
Is overly compliant, passive, or withdrawn.
Comes to school or other activities early, stays late, and does not want to go home.

The Parent:
Shows little concern for the child.
Denies the existence of—or blames the child for—the child's problems in school or at home.
Asks teachers or other caretakers to use harsh physical discipline if the child misbehaves.
Sees the child as entirely bad, worthless, or burdensome.
Demands a level of physical or academic performance the child cannot achieve.
Looks primarily to the child for care, attention, and satisfaction of emotional needs.

The Parent and Child:
Rarely touch or look at each other.
Consider their relationship entirely negative.
State that they do not like each other.

Types of Abuse

The following are some signs often associated with particular types of child abuse and neglect: physical abuse, neglect, sexual abuse, and emotional abuse. It is important to note, however, these types of abuse are more typically found in combination than alone. A physically abused child, for example, is often emotionally abused as well, and a sexually abused child also may be neglected.

Signs of Physical Abuse

Consider the possibility of physical abuse when the child:
Has unexplained burns, bites, bruises, broken bones, or black eyes.
Has fading bruises or other marks noticeable after an absence from school.
Seems frightened of the parents and protests or cries when it is time to go home.
Shrinks at the approach of adults.
Reports injury by a parent or another adult caregiver.

Consider the possibility of physical abuse when the parent or other adult caregiver:
Offers conflicting, unconvincing, or no explanation for the child's injury.
Describes the child as "evil," or in some other very negative way.
Uses harsh physical discipline with the child.
Has a history of abuse as a child.

Signs of Neglect

Consider the possibility of neglect when the child:
Is frequently absent from school.
Begs or steals food or money.
Lacks needed medical or dental care, immunizations, or glasses.
Is consistently dirty and has severe body odor.
Lacks sufficient clothing for the weather.
Abuses alcohol or other drugs.
States that there is no one at home to provide care.

Consider the possibility of neglect when the parent or other adult caregiver:
Appears to be indifferent to the child.
Seems apathetic or depressed.
Behaves irrationally or in a bizarre manner.
Is abusing alcohol or other drugs.

Signs of Sexual Abuse

Consider the possibility of sexual abuse when the child:
Has difficulty walking or sitting.
Suddenly refuses to change for gym or to participate in physical activities.
Reports nightmares or bed wetting.
Experiences a sudden change in appetite.
Demonstrates bizarre, sophisticated, or unusual sexual knowledge or behavior.
Becomes pregnant or contracts a venereal disease, particularly if under age 14.
Runs away.
Reports sexual abuse by a parent or another adult caregiver.

Consider the possibility of sexual abuse when the parent or other adult caregiver:
Is unduly protective of the child or severely limits the child's contact with other children, especially of the opposite sex.
Is secretive and isolated.
Is jealous or controlling with family members.

Signs of Emotional Maltreatment

Consider the possibility of emotional maltreatment when the child:
Shows extremes in behavior, such as overly compliant or demanding behavior, extreme passivity, or aggression.
Is either inappropriately adult (parenting other children, for example) or inappropriately infantile (frequently rocking or head-banging, for example).
Is delayed in physical or emotional development.
Has attempted suicide.
Reports a lack of attachment to the parent.

Consider the possibility of emotional maltreatment when the parent or other adult caregiver:
Constantly blames, belittles, or berates the child.
Is unconcerned about the child and refuses to consider offers of help for the child's problems.
Overtly rejects the child.


Identifying Child Abuse and Neglect
Resources and information from the Child Welfare Information Gateway website about signs and symptoms of child maltreatment, including training resources.

Preventing Child Abuse and Neglect
Resources and information from the Child Welfare Information Gateway website.

Tuesday, January 8, 2008


There are many factors that can lead to a Sistah deciding to leave an abusive relationship. It is sometimes a choice that requires a lot of time to process. For me if was very agonizing to realize that my relationship was not going to work - I had this tape in my mind that the Afrikan family was the most important institution and that rough times were just part of the process. As I played that tape everyday - my spirit was fading away - I was depressed- immobile - I often just sat by the window looking outside. I was in so much denial I could not really figure out what was wrong with me. I remember being told "you have a husband who is of **this profession**, you live in this great house on a lake, you don't have to work - you need to just be grateful and move on..." I actually took this on and tried - really tried to be "grateful" and I couldn't move. It was like I was dying a slow death. I think many people can only visualize an abuser as an unemployed bum with dirt under his nails and a beer belly -while this could fit the description of some, men with various educational, economic and professional backgrounds are abusers. Just because someone is a lawyer, a judge, a minister, a doctor or ceo does not mean they are above abuse - in fact many of these abusers have more access to controlling their victims - they can hire private detectives to find them and use their professional clout to discredit their victims and win "friends".
Leaving is a BIG STEP and a choice ONLY YOU CAN MAKE. Many factors can delay leaving- like children, finances and availability of immediate shelter. A Sistah has to think of all of the options and make a plan. A plan is the best way to protect yourself and keep yourself safe. Seek out counseling and get advice. Below are some websites that outline a plan for leaving. If you have to leave right away - have an emergency plan and a small bag with an extra car key, a little cash, change of clothing (for children, too), copies of important documents, medication, phone numbers, etc... Keep the bag hidden but accessible. Also, have a place to go - a friend's house, a family member's home, motel or if need - go to a police station - they are bound by law to help you.

DAY 31 (write it down, meditate on it and journal your thoughts)
31. God/The Creator is lavish, unfailing Abundance, the rich omnipresent substance of the Universe. This all providing Source of infinite prosperity is individualized as me — the Reality of me.

Monday, January 7, 2008


WOW!!! Ten more days of the 40-Day Prosperity Process (for those who started with me). I am knowing that everyone on this journey is realizing their treasures each day - in gratitude.
This week I am dedicating the blog to the subject of Domestic Violence each day. I hope those who reside in the Atlanta area will attend the Community Assembly this weekend on January 12th, 6pm at the Afrikan Djeli, 840 Ralph Abernathy Blvd, Atlanta.

Did you know that domestic violence has a cycle? Yes, it does. When I was in my undergrad studies I volunteered for a domestic violence crisis line - being a part of the organization I had to learn about the cycle of violence. I can say that this knowledge helped me realize I was in a situation that was getting more and more abusive. I knew when it got physical that I was no longer "imagining" things that were happening. It did take some time for me to really get it- and I have to say a lot of that had to do with trying to work things out. I had this vision for my marriage to be this "indestructible rock" that was going to ride out any storms of trouble. This outlook masked the actual abuse that was happening...I had on these rose colored glasses- I didn't want to see what I was seeing - what I was experiencing. I kept trying to talk everything over - I kept trying to clarify and nothing worked. My son was starting to rebel and I felt myself getting more and more scared for him. I would call family meetings -even tried to get friends that were married for a while to help facilitate our process...things would shift for a day or two and then we were back on the road to hell. I share this because I of all people - a Domestic Violence counselor -should have peeped this whole situation from the start -yet I couldn't really see it all and when I did see it I was in denial. Shame plays a big role in keeping abuse silent - true healing happens when you break the silence and reach out to those who can help you. Please see the article below.
Sistah C

Cycle of Abuse

A cycle of abuse occurs in most domestic violence situations. A Cycle of abuse is abuse that occurs in a repeating pattern. Abuse is identifiable as being cyclical in two ways: it is both generational and episodic. Generational cycles of abuse are passed down, by example and exposure, from parents to children. Episodic abuse occurs in a repeating pattern within the context of at least two individuals within a family system. It may involve spousal abuse, child abuse, or even elder abuse.

Stages of Abuse?

Domestic violence has three main stages. These stages will vary in time and intensity, but they are generally present in all instances of domestic violence.

Stage One: Tension Building

During stage one of domestic violence, small physical assaults may occur. Usually, the victim is able to calm down the abuser through techniques he or she has learned from dealing with the abuser in the past. Many abuse victims will inwardly deny that their partners are abusing them. They may smooth over the small isolated assaults and make excuses for the abusers in their minds. However, many abuse victims do recognize that these small incidents will generally escalate and lead to a bigger, more dangerous incident. Victims seem to take it upon themselves to keep things running smoothly so as not to aggravate the abuser. The psychological stress that a victim endures during this stage is brutal.

Stage Two: Explosion

During stage two of domestic violence, nothing the victim can do or say can appease or stop the abuser’s violence. All of the tensions from stage one are released. The abuser has no self-control and can severely injure his or her partner. The abuser is in a blind rage and is oblivious to the damage he or she is inflicting on his or her partner. This phase of the cycle is generally shorter than the other two stages. However, the abuse that a victim endures during this stage is tormenting.

Stage Three: Calm/Relief

Stage three of domestic violence is welcomed by both the abuser and the victim. Tension and brutality has been released and loving kindness is put in its place. The abuser will be very remorseful, charming and warm. Promises are made to the victim and the abuser may shed tears. Both the abuser and the victim want to believe that it will never happen again. Stage three is when most victims of domestic violence get the courage to leave.

If you are a victim of domestic violence, help is available. You can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE. They will direct you to places in your area where you can seek help.

DAY 30 (write it down, meditate on it, journal your thoughts)
30. I keep my mind and thoughts off "this world" and I place my entire focus on God/The Creator within as the only Cause of my prosperity. I acknowledge the Inner Presence as the only activity in my financial affairs, as the substance of all things visible. I place my faith in the Principle of Abundance in action within me.

Sunday, January 6, 2008



Men, united, can help stop abuse
Sholain Govender
28 November 2007

As South Africans are being called on to help stop violence against women and children in the country, two local organisations are striving to nurture a stronger and wiser generation of South African men.

This year's 16 Days of Activism for No Violence against Women and Children Campaign was launched on Sunday, with several men's marches taking place in cities throughout the country.

The campaign challenges South African men to declare a truce on violence against women and children - and, ultimately, to make it a permanent one.

Daniel Leshike and Dumisani Rebombo are already doing this. They are among a number of men who are leading men in the fight against gender violence on a daily basis.

Men as Partners
At the age of 15, Rebombo raped a girl along with a friend. "I did it as an act of masculinity," admits the man who is now 46 years old. He married at a young age and went on to use religion to maintain superiority over his wife.

"I insisted that she had to listen to everything I said because that was what God wanted," he says.

Rebombo is now completely reformed, a change which he attributes to education. As the EngenderHealth Men as Partners South African programme manager, he has worked with thousands of men from around the country over the past seven years.

Addressing Parliament this month, Deputy President Phumzile Mlambo-Ngcuka called on South African men to "take ownership" of the issue of violence perpetrated against women.

The only way there can be a change in the behaviour of men in the country, Mlambo-Ngcuka said, is to increase their level of understanding of the issues around abuse against women and children.

This is exactly what Rebombo does as he counsels men and facilitates workshops where men, young and old, are encouraged to change abusive social patterns to help reduce the abuse, rape and murder of women and children in their communities.

"I started volunteering when I worked for Rand Water, and after leaving the company I decided to get more involved," says Rebombo.

Helping men to adapt
Daniel Leshike (29), co-ordinator of the Agisanang Domestic Abuse Prevention and Training (Adapt) men's programme, dedicated his social work career to empowering men in Alexandra, a township in Johannesburg, after training as a counsellor following his university years.

Adapt facilitates a forum with a membership of around 26 men, aged from 16 upwards, who host a number of discussion groups in the community aimed at raising awareness of issues surrounding abuse, gender stereotypes and equality.

"Our main objectives are to include men as part of the solution to gender-based violence and to empower men to take control of their lives," says Leshike.

Adapt trains forum members in trauma counselling and gender sensitivity and runs several parallel programmes with a youth division in order to promote good fathering in the Alexandra community.

In a novel bid to break the silence surrounding abuse, Adapt has a formed a relationship with the Alexandra Liquor Traders Association, and forum members visit taverns regularly, creating impromptu discussions with patrons on topics related to gender violence.

"Some men tell us that it is their culture to be in control or abuse a woman because 'a woman is a woman'," says Leshike. "But we tell them that in African culture a woman is a flower."

Good men - who remain silent
With over 7 000 men seeking assistance from his organisation annually, Rebombo believes his work is contributing to the eradication of gender violence in the country.

He says there are many good men out there - "I believe, and research says so" - but that most of these men remain silent when abuse takes place.

Leshike agrees, saying that there are men who would make good role models but they need to stand up and be heard in order to make a difference in the country.

Both men agree that many challenges exist in South Africa regarding the education of men in the eradication of gender-based violence. Among these challenges are a lack of sufficient funding, the abundance of stereotypes, and misinterpretation of religion and culture.

Most challenging of all in the battle being fought by counsellors such as these, however, is the reluctance of men to work with men - a battle that still needs to be won.

Source: BuaNews Link to story:

DAY 29 (write it down, meditiate on it for 15min, journal your thoughts)
29. When I am aware of the God Self within me as my total fulfillment, I am totally fulfilled. I am now aware of this Truth. I have found the secret of life, and I relax in the knowledge that the Activity of Divine Abundance is eternally operating in my life. I simply have to be aware of the flow, the radiation, of that Creative Energy, which is continuously, easily and effortlessly pouring forth from my Divine Consciousness. I am now aware. I am now in the flow.

Saturday, January 5, 2008



Welcome to the Nature Year 2008 in the Dagara Tradition of Burkino Faso, West Africa. My name is Mbali (Zulu for the flower) given to me by the great High Sanusi, Shaman Credo Mutwa from South Africa.

I began to write this for you and the power went out so I am taking another look at what feels good to share. Nature teaches us about change, transformation and authenticity. It is very specific. There is no room for dis-clarity. It is asking us to remove the masks that no longer serve us and move into our true nature to become truly who we are.
This year calls us to make changes and transform where we are stuck, what we have resisted, where we have put off or away. It also calls us to remember our essence.
It is inviting us to be introspective about parts of ourselves that are shut down, dried up and need regeneration and revitalising. It also asks us to remember the cycles of life, birth death rebirth and life and our deep connection to our spirit allies, the winged ones four legged, two legged, creepy crawlies, ones that slide and swim. All have medicine for us all are waiting for our requests and all stand ready for our deep connection.
We have trained ourselves to move away from our true nature, whether it be through conditioning or donning the masks that others expect us to wear. In doing that we have forgotton our wildness, cultivate our true nature to become gentle warriors to support rather than deny who we truly are. When we do this our longing for belonging is at risk and we continue to fool ourselves that we are our true selves and yet we separate ourselves from our greenness our essence our basic beliefs our greatness and we continue to tell ourselves we are not ok.
Nature challenges us this year to show up and take a risk, otherwise we will always remain in the discomfort of the comfort, to live with compromises and to deny ourselves our right to live fully.
What is the key to unlocking our true nature and living it? Let us learn from the trees the relentless ways of sleeping and coming back to life, let us learn from the flowers who do not question what is next other than being a beautiful bloom and the animals who embody qualities that are our medicine. Go to nature often this year, to invoke, to do ritual, to revitalize where we are burnt out and to reconnect to our spirit allies. Do vision quests to hear the messages and to understand that we are truly part of mother nature. Spend time with redwoods that are thousands of years old and whose roots are interconnected to remind us of unity and community and the interconnectedness of all beings. Go to the water to hear about flow, peace and reconciliation. Lie on the earth at sundown that magic time that reminds us of little sorrows and let mother earth hold all woes and troubles. And lie on a rock and ask the rock to rumble our bones to help us to remember the beauty of who we are, why we came here and our purpose.
And above all just sit and allow Nature reminds us of magic and mystery and allow it to take your breath away, wait there quietly , something WILL happen………..May the ancestors bless and protect you always.

“They say that animals recharge their innocence each time they hoof the earth, and we are reborn when we touch what matters”- Mark Nepo

Mbali is a teacher of Traditional Indigenous Wisdom. Click here to visit her website.

DAY 28 (write it down, meditate for 15min, journal your thoughts)
28. My consciousness of the Spirit within me as my unlimited Source is the Divine Power to restore the years the locusts have eaten, to make all things new, to lift me up to the High Road of abundant prosperity. This awareness, understanding and knowledge of Spirit appears as every visible form and experience that I could possibly desire.

Friday, January 4, 2008


On January 12th in Atlanta there will be a community assembly. The topic of the assembly is titled "State of Emergency" Stopping Family Violence and Restoring Traditional African Centered Values. The assembly will take place at the Afrikan Djeli Cultural Center at 840 Ralph D. Abernathy Atlanta's West End. Starts at 6pm. I have committed myself to going and I sent out an email some time ago to people I know hoping they will attend. My hopes are that it will be a time to discover what truly are traditional African-Centered Values in regards to relationships. Personally, abusive acts committed against my son and I were by someone who claimed to be "African" and "Conscious".
Abusers have a way of twisting the truth. I find some people would rather not hear the truth- they want silence...they want to be neutral. A famous quote says, "The hottest places in hell are reserved for those who, in times of great moral crisis, maintain their neutrality." Abuse in our community is real yet there are people who want to turn a deaf ear and a blind eye. There are people who are literally afraid to know what happened to my son and I - they rest comfortably in their ignorance and make decisions from those places. How do such acts help abusers? How can ignoring an abuser's illness help them to resolve their issues and heal? I wish these neutral people would answer these questions... In the meantime, the door is open for abusers to continue to commit the same acts of domestic violence and it is sanctioned- YES- Sanctioned by a "community" drunk off the wine deception, apathy, power and status. The saddest part is that WOMEN (not SISTAHS) drink of this wine...
All said and done - the truth will be revealed.

DAY 27 (write it down, meditate on it and journal it)
27. The Divine Consciousness that I am is forever expressing its true nature of Abundance. This is its responsibility, not mine. My only responsibility is to be aware of this Truth. Therefore, I am totally confident in letting go and letting God/the Creator appear as the abundant all sufficiency in my life and affairs.

Thursday, January 3, 2008



Winter is a time that the earth begins to go back to its fullness- when everything "dies"-leaves turn brown, grow hard and make mulch for the earth. Trees and grass become dormant, many animals grow still and hibernate. There is still activity but it is slower and regenerative. It is a subtle yet powerful transformation that takes place. Healing is the same way. If we take our cues from nature this is a time to reflect, go inward and be in your divine self. Look has what had to die so that you could move forward in a new way. If you have not let a part of yourself transform then ask yourself why? Transformation is natural, it is the way of the earth. Rigidness is symbolic of death-flexibility is symbolic of life - just take a look at a green leaf and a brown leaf.
One lesson I learned over the years is to move towards challenges- go inside them- find out what and why they are- surrender to them and let them transform me. The world can't benefit from our contributions if we are stuck in stagnation, this is why we must heal ourselves at every opportunity.
I remember years ago living in Oakland I would take the train to work in San Francisco. I was sitting there reading when an older Sistah stood up and told everyone in the car that she was once very ill and thought she was going to die. She said that in her prayers she got a message to make herself a medicine and with this medicine she healed herself. She then took out slips of paper and handed them out to everyone on the train saying she promised to let others know about this medicine and how to heal themselves. It was interesting to see some people refuse the paper but I took the paper - on it was a recipe using olive oil and sugar. I thought to myself of course the medicine would be this simple because the most powerful part of the formula was in her believing in her divine self to guide her towards healing and in her sharing it with the rest of the world.
Yesterday, I completed my first piece of art since the end of my marriage. I had been working on an idea to make dolls and last night I completed my first one... Her name is Ma Ye Ye - The Healer, The Ancient One. She stands about 20" tall and is made out of natural materials - she holds a cluster of quartz -which is said to be the master healer of all conditions. She is very powerful and has come through as medicine for myself and for everyone. I will get some better pictures of her - here she is...

DAY 26 (write it down, meditate on it for 15min, journal your thoughts)
26. My inner supply instantly and constantly takes on form and experience according to my needs and desires, and as the Principle of Supply in action, it is impossible for me to have any unfulfilled needs or desires.

Wednesday, January 2, 2008


Pic:The Thousand-Hand Kwan-Yin Dance. Kwan-Yin is the Asian Goddess who is said the hear the cries of the world.

This morning I woke up and decided to start my day outside with a nice walking meditation. Well, I will tell you it must be about 30 degrees outside so it was a brisk walking meditation. It was a nice day regardless- there was still a sleepiness in the neighborhood and the birds were just beginning to rise. As I walked down the quiet empty street I was reminded of my meditation practice and how over the years it has helped me heal great suffering in my consciousness. I learned early on that suffering comes from extremes in your mind state- extreme desires, extreme expectations, extreme hate and extreme sadness. The Buddhist advise in their teachings that one should do their best to stay on the Middle Path. The Middle Path gives vision and knowledge and leads to calm, realization and enlightenment. The Middle Path relates directly to what they teach is the Noble Eightfold Path, namely: right understanding, right thought, right speech, right action, right livelihood, right effort, right mindfulness, right concentration. Although I am not a Buddhist I can respect the wisdom of these teachings and see how they can help guide us when we are distracted by life's drama. I think the Middle Path is not so much about being neutral but it is about seeing how two opposing forces just spin themselves out -dispersing tons of energy and getting nowhere. The Middle Path requires us to see both sides and understand how each side got there which is through suffering and placing all the power in "man" than in the Universal Spirit (often referred to as God).
Today's Abundance Principle speaks so much to letting go of concepts of "man" power. Each day when you wake up you decide to believe in the world created by "man" or to believe in the world created by the Universal Spirit. In each struggle you have you decide to work with the power of "man" or you decide to work with the power of the Universal Spirit. By the word "man" I simply mean a reality created by humans that holds no metaphysical belief-the belief that only what you can see, touch, hear, taste and smell is all that there is... I think we know there is more...

DAY 25 (write it down, meditate for 15 min, journal your thoughts)
25. Money is not my supply. No person, place or condition is my supply. My awareness, understanding, and knowledge of the all-providing activity of the Divine Mind within me is my supply. My consciousness of this Truth is unlimited, therefore, my supply is unlimited.

Tuesday, January 1, 2008


Artist: Seydou Keita

Everything happens for a reason-this is what I have been taught by the lessons of my life. I had a chance to reflect last night on what it was that I wanted to learn from the events for 2007. I went over the good, the challenging and gave thanks for all theses experiences. As I wake this morning I am clear, focused and I have received the following messages for 2008:

The Universal Spirit (often called God) is the only power in my life. No person, place, condition has any power over me other than this ALL KNOWING ENERGY.

Everyday before getting out of bed commit the power of that day to the Universal Spirit (God/Creator, Deities and Ancestors) or commit it to man. It is my choice...

Restore the Afrikan Female Spirit and I will restore myself, my family and my community.

When I started this blog I had just left an abusive marriage that not only impacted me but my son as well. At first I didn't intend for the blog to process my experiences but I found myself on that path. Every time I wanted to be silent about my experiences Spirit kept saying, "Put it out there. Somebody needs to hear this..." As I wrote about my feelings others would share with me through emails how they had been through or are going through the same things. I realized that my suffering was not unique, that Sistahs all over the planet are being treated badly and it is as if the rest of the world is silent and indifferent. I found myself posting not only about the challenges but about the victories, not only about the sadness but also about the fight. Another morning Spirit whispered again and said, "Your work, your purpose is around THE RESTORATION OF THE AFRIKAN FEMALE SPIRIT." I thought this was a tall order. I was not sure right away what this meant. I have been meditating on it for some time now and I am now clear. My purpose is to be A LOUD VOICE FOR THE JUST TREATMENT OF AFRIKAN WOMEN THROUGHOUT THE DIASPORA WHO ARE/HAVE BEEN VICTIMS OF VIOLENCE. I have decided that my "voice" is my art work, my healing practice and my organizing skills. As I move forward I will provide more details but I wanted to step out on this purpose and share it.
Peace, Love and Truth Going Forward,
Sistah C

DAY24 (write this in your journal, meditate on it for 15min, journal your thoughts for 5min)
24. Through my consciousness of my Original-Spirit-Self, the Creator within me, as my Source, I draw into my mind and feeling nature the very substance of Spirit. This substance is my supply, thus my consciousness of the Presence the Creator, the Spirit World and my Ancestors within me is my supply.