Saturday, November 10, 2007

Reclaiming My Art, My Voice

I have identified myself as an artist yet most of the time I am silent about my creations. My art brings up a lot of my feelings around self worth - because I have this question about the value of my creations. I have to admit that I have lived in fear around my artistic creations. TODAY I take a new step towards revealing myself as an artist. I will accept that my work may not appeal to everyone but I know that it comes from my spirit.
I have two things to share on this blog today. A drawing and a poem.
The Drawing
My friend Mbali ( facilitates nature journeys (vision quests)on Mt. Shasta. If you have never been to Mt.Shasta - it is a very powerful place with this Grandmother River. There is a small(African owned) hot springs in Shasta called Stewart Mineral Springs. Its a very rustic place and is known to have the worlds most powerful healing waters. I would suggest camping there on the nature preserve right outside Stewart along Mama River. Twice I have slept along Mama River's side while she spoke deeply to me through her rushing water. She spoke to me about my bloodline and my destiny. Both times during my visits I would create images that spoke specifically to the people on the journey with me. I would just start drawing and in the end I would give them each their image. Some were pretty, some were scary but I trusted that each had a message. My last visit we took pictures of the images before I gave them out. The one above is one I drew for a sistah while she was on her solo time.

The Poem
I don't know if I am a poet but I gave birth to this yesterday. In my head it is a song but it can be spoken as well.

Before Taking Revenge Take Two Lives…

I see you
When you don’t think I do
I once was blind
Now I see through
Your lies
Your deceit
You must feel incomplete
As of late…

I see you
Pretending to have a heart
When you’re just not that smart
To hide your hate

I see you
Following your lust
When in the end
It was my heart you should have trust

I see you
wanting to be a king
but a king can’t flyyyyy
On broken wings

I see you
born to do much more
but you live your life
just to keep score

I see you
blaming others for your pain
when you committed the crimes
to make yourself insane

I see you
quoting great Afrikan minds
yet in reality
your consciousness is blind

I see you
you’re mentally enslaved
trying to pretend your brave
yet I see you

I see you
wanted me as your slave
wanted to stand in my way
wanted to slander my name
wanted to add poverty to my claim
and curse me to my face
wanted to disgrace my family name
all because you feel so small
but it is me who is tall
but it is me who is tall
but it is me who is tall

I seeeeeeeee youuuuuu
behind those Afrikan clothes
hiding your scars, those holes
in your heart…

Perhaps its ok to just look the part but
I see you
Yes, I see you


Anonymous said...

Is this a self critique, a critique of someone you know, a critique of lots of people or a critique of just Afrikan Men?