Friday, December 31, 2010
Sistahs, just last night my shrine gave me one last lesson to learn for the year of 2010 - responsibility. This year all I can do is give so much thanks to the Mother Spirit for nurturing me, teaching me and helping me to re-remember the SHE in ME. For so long my eyes were clouded with a vision of life that was unnatural to me - I found myself frustrated most of the time because I could not fit into that life no matter how I tried. When I decided to simply let go and be who I AM...At first it felt like isolation but I held on and started to connect with like minded Sistahs who were also feeling the same thing. This whole year has felt like a family reunion to me.
So, the Mother Within spoke to me this morning and what I understood was that the future is here! Now is the time for those of us who have re-remembered to work together. Before any collaboration can take place each of us must make a declaration of responsibility. Sistahs, the man-made world insists on hierarchies -someone above and someone below. In a limited world view only some can be leaders the rest of us must follow. Leadership however is a mechanism within each of us that has to be activated. Why? Each of us has an important part - a unique part to contribute to the transition of this world community. ONE part missing leaves us in imbalance. This imbalance is where we rest now-in limitation. We are LIMITLESS beings dreaming a nightmare of limitation.
When we take responsibility for our uniqueness and yes, our individuality, we see our eternal connection. We are no longer fooled by systems, cults, so-called cultural ideologies that root us in suffering and render us powerless to take dominion in our lives. WE ARE THE BEFORE OF THE BEFORE. Any condition that asks you to uphold another human being as more powerful than you; that asks you to uphold an ideology in which you must submit to group think; that ask you to submit to on group because you are born of an inferior group; that ask you to submit to a limited role; that asks you to kill nature, your emotions, your compassion and your love IS ASKING YOU TO NOT BE IN RESPONSIBILITY. The paradox is that you ARE STILL RESPONSIBLE AS A FOLLOWER.
The move for many wombyn to find their path back to the Divine Feminine is a BEAUTIFUL AND POWERFUL experience. Be careful Sistahs to understand it is not about a new paradigm operating in a man-made world under man-made conditions. The Divine Feminine can NOT exist in man-made containers under such weak limitations. The Mother Within asks us to take responsibility - to walk with an understanding and honoring of this energy. I also get that it asks us to be active in healing ourselves, healing the earth and loving others. USE YOUR POWER FOR GOOD.
I SPEAK MY WORD to serve the Mother Within and take responsibility by being the most POWERFUL and COMPASSIONATE WOMBYN I AM while assisting in providing my own unique skills and gifts to the preparation and completion of world healing.
Happy New Year! May it be BIGGER than you imagine!
Peace and Hugs!!
Posted by Camara Meri Rajabari at 3:14 PM
Sunday, December 26, 2010
I can't seem to express how much I appreciate and LUV my life! I have learned this year that it is important to keep pushin', sometimes even fighten' for the things you deserve even when it seems that challenges are insurmountable. Last week my son and I went away for his birthday and a small business trip. We had such a great time together! I think of where I was just a couple of years ago - we could barely shop for food. During these times I knew that my life would change...I knew that I had to believe in myself even if life presented me with situations that seemed to tell another story. During those times my son went without many times...Like many young boys there has been a lack of consistent role models for him...I would always encourage him to be himself - to love himself, think for himself and do the right thing for that is really what a man is made of...On his 18th birthday I saw the emergence of a new young man. My co-workers constantly commented on him - his intelligence, his demeanor and his awareness. I am very proud to be his mother. I felt equally happy to be able to take him on a trip to celebrate a new chapter in his life - a self defined young manhood.
Posted by Camara Meri Rajabari at 8:05 PM
Saturday, December 11, 2010
The other day I went to one of my favorite sites, the Osho Zen website to get a quick divination and the words read: "...Insecurity is the only way to grow, to face danger is the only way to grow, to accept the challenge of the unknown is the only way to grow."...The reading was so right on for me. I find myself at times staring at the life in front of me - looking at the accomplishments, the treasures, the "good" and "bad" of it, however lately this life has been feeling much like a blank slate. I spent a lot of 2010 unlearning, unraveling limitations that I have clung to for so long...Some parts of this process was easy cause "...the shit was tired and old...", yet other parts were more difficult. Some belief systems shake your very foundation. When faced with those moments one can decide to cling to what is familiar and secure or face that in the unknown may be even a greater treasure - a greater life.
For a long time I use to have dreams of being chased by a crazy person who wanted to kill me. In the dream, I was in a house, desperately trying to survive. It felt real- I am sure that my heart was beating fast in my sleep. Once I started to trust myself and honor myself I noticed that the dreams lessen and the last time I had the dream I did something different - I decided to fight the person - this symbol of fears. The house was the symbol for my life.
Funny, how a dream can teach you much about life. Many of us live in a nightmare of comfort...We have built a reality - a life that we accept 'as is'. As long as life does not change we find ease in the predictability of it all yet there is a hunger that starts with a quiet pang then it grows to a growl and when that is not satisfied the hunger turns to longing. I find in those moments one can invite anything into life - any drama to help take your mind off the void.
As I think of the new year that is upon me - I wish to reach for the unknown as my guide pass limitation. I am deciding to face the danger to being BIGGER, more POWERFUL, MORE DYNAMIC even at the risk of disrupting the comfort of relationships that assume I would never wish to achieve such heights...
Posted by Camara Meri Rajabari at 12:37 AM